Back again

okay, cny is ard the corner, and is really busy getting ready for it. Decorating my house, buying new year clothes, food.... Its really FUN!

However, there are so many quizes, test, exams and projects haunting me. This is really bad. 

And this whole week pontang all lectures, haha, cox the new year mood is aldy here!!!!!!!

And to the ABC, pls stop fooling ard here at my blog, this is not somewhere u talk nonsense. Its really irritating not putting ur name there. Is it becox u got no guts to put it? too SHAME to face me is it?!Dun think i dunno who u are. Or not say WHO U ARE if u really wanna know the truth. If not i will LOCK my blog immediately.

Long Long hours

Finally, some time to blog. Had been really busy over the past few days. Over projects and all. cant understand why projects are due after CNY. Met twinny just now, and we really had a good laugh! really enjoyed the time with her (:

life gets stagnant when i have to play the guessing game. I'm so tired. Dont you think of my feelings when u do all these? I dont feel good. Nobody will understand how i feel anyway. U dont even bother abt mw. I feel like a fool all these while. I not not being ridiculous, just dont feel good. I'm growing to detest her, my heart is so pain. Pls dont leave me alone.

Why do things always go the opposite side that i want it to be. I'm so freaking tired, I dont care if the world is going to collapse, but pls just give me the rights i deserve.

My heart is like weighing a million tons, always, forever.

People always dont appreciate what i've done for them, am i really so stupid? That until a point where its a Must thing for me to be nice to them. Its really heartening, can they change? 

There is up your service workshop tmr at 8.30am!!!! TO 6pm. 
OMG @@

Swensen today!

Went to celebrate my church friend b'day at swesnsen earlier on.i had breaded chicken (Y) thumbs up! Super nice, hasnt had such a nice treat this few weeks. And alsom had oreo ice cream cake. OMG, its heavenly!!! But their service really sucks man! LOL dont feel like elaborating much tough. Had to do projects and complete my fpqap research, this is torturing. But thinking abt the nearing of CNY really cheers me up! ^^

Although things are sort of stable now, but i do know whats going on. Sometimes we just choose to ignore certain things cox we still want to keep it going. Not that we dun really care anymore. I shall not be complacent abt this and continue on with my life. 

you noe, but sometimes when u think back, when u have the time to stop and think abt life. What have u actually accomplish? Do u have any regrets at all? Certainly, if i were to be given a choice again, i will choose to live my life again, but friends and families, i will choose to reamain the same. I love them, it might not be enitrely their fault, or might not be mutual, but the problem doesnt lie in them.Perhaps i should be the one leaving.

Things are starting to look at the brighter side, but i still have a heavy heart.

i dun wanna be like her

New hair. new Life

Had a new hairstyle peeps! I perm my whole hair this time, wanted something new though. LOL

will be uploading pics but it arent that clear on photos though. Well, sat there for like 4 hours?! i went Jean yip at like 5 plus, and only get to finish at 9 plus. LOL

Tiring though, and had our supermarket tour on this saturday (22 Jan). It was alright, rather everything turns our smoothly. (: then night time, went ikea with my parents to buy some things. I bought a few cactus! It was beautiful :D

Just had our Potluck today at church, i brought tau sa pia there, and there were great food! Good fellowshipping too:D

Now had to chiong my projects, report, research and tmr there is commN quiz! OMG, cant even enjoy my sunday! and cant go chinatown today because of all this shit!

My new perm (:

My beautiful cactus! <3

Another day of my life

Finally get to blog again. Well just came back frm simei, bought my crumpler bag!! (: quite Ex though. Yesterday's catering tech we cooked japanese cruisine! OMG!! my group is in charge of miso soup, and it was nice, though abit salty ah. There is teriyaki chicken, tempura vegetables, mochi and veg. OMG, nice nice nice though i think chicken is the best!!!

Well had our fpqap lab test today. omg, i screw up everything man. LOL and there is pdm quiz 2 tmr, havent even study can! Nvm, i wanna go watch mobtv and eat my bread! hahahaha

Ps: chevy, pls let things improve more, and no more going back to the past, its miserable.

OUR JAP FOOD!!!

IDOIT LEMON TEA!

Excuse me, if you dun have concrete evidence, pls dun accuse me of what no forgiveness kinda thing can! Idiot sia this person- lemon tea!!!!!!!!

see whose at fault first can! and God will not any how punish people, god knows who is the one who is not doing justice you ass hole! Fucker!!!

Cruise

WOW. finally back from cruise. Had a fun time there relaxing though. Not much things to play there, but its quite enjoyable. The crews were very friendly and warm. And there are alot of handsome ang mohs! HAHAHA

The food were okay, played bingo,went to sauna with cherie and after that went for a swim and jacuzzi!!! And went to the disco there, had some fun and dance!!!! We oso went to the casino and played rollette, win some $$ and was nice experience. It was the most fun i would say. Haha

Watch the performances and went to the top deck to play golf, watch sceneries and oso went down to penang when we reach there. we went to the peranakan museum which was really amazing. It was nice and can get to learn some culture of peranakan. But time flies really fast, and it ended really quickly. Now am back in singapore :( had to start studying for exams, projects and assignment. Really miss the cruise.

And monday, after we arrived in singapore, we rush back to TP for lessons that starts at 9am. LOL, that was super early. And my head was still like spinning non stop, had headache and motion sickness, really feel like vomiting. So after tut, took cab home and slept alot of hrs! Until next day. haha

PS: i hope things are getting abit better, to try not to think abt it, look at it at a brighter side, chevy.

Some pictures below (:

the peranakan museum

The ancestor hall

Using tower to made this!

FML

 

I dunno why i am living in this world, i shouldnt have been here in the first place. WTF am i here? so irritating right? Looking at all the pictures, i just couldnt understand why. WHY is it always like that? I am not a substitute, I am not a rubbish, I am not a FOOL.

why do people treat me this way? Do u noe everytime now when i thought of coming to school, i fear alot. I think abt them, i think abt what they do. I feel that there is so many secrets btw us. I tried not to think, but it doesnt work that way. I've not talk bad abt u, not a single time at all. But i think u failed me. TOTAL degrees of changes. U dun have to show this infront of me, it make me look like a fool. I dun feel good, i dun LIKE! Excuses and excuses i've come up for u, but it just proves me right everytime.

There is just so much to tell u, but do u think i've the courage to say? Ur actions aldy showed me everything, i dunno, perhaps its me again. But sometimes i really wonder if i vanish, will the world be better?

These things are bottling up in my heart, no more space, no more room. What if it burst?

I've so much so much to say, but who to tell? I'm scared and tired of humans tricks. I cant take it anymore.
Why is it not u? its simple, cox ur actions say it all. Everything changes, everything.

And I dun have the courage to carry on.

Something-amiss

There's just something amiss. Just that, cant feel, cant touch, cant see but can sense it. the every little actions makes me feel uncomfortable. Cant u feel i am having a barrier infront of me to u?

Woke up quite late today as school starts at 1, had 2 slices of bread and a glass of milk, then watch tv awhile and went to bath, get ready for school. School was tiring, had pdm lab and cook 

tomato sauce.

Thinking of the lab tmr can kill me, catering tech man! and tmr lesson's at 8am!!!!! I dun like catering tech, lectures always so early, lab always so long and late. Tmr ends at 6 plus, but i guess we gotta stay back and eat our dinner (nyonya dishes) and we are cooking curry chicken. OMG, cant imagine the fats that is going into my body.

Guess not much time to go gym tmr, shall go later and tmr, shall see what exercise i can do! haha

3 more days and its cruise time! Going cruise with cherie!! Omg, cant imagine the fun and nonsense we'll gonna had! :D YIPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Oh yeah, 13th cells pictures are out!

shout like this?

the 13th cells pictures are out!

Soul-less

Something is just in between, its invisible, but u can feel it inevitably. The change, its hard to describe, not entirely bad, but still it strikes me. U might not feel it, but it hacks deeply into my heart. Many things that u thought i am unaware of, i am not. I believe in my strong sense of intuition, definately there's something. Nobody's is at fault, but nobody ever thought of me. Its just the way u behave that sinks my thinking deeper and deeper, and makes me think really hard. I always come up with 101 reasons to convince myself that there is nothing of what i am thinking. But i know i have to face the fact sometimes, things just will change. Somethings u thought would stay forever will not, chevy. The rocks will shake, the seas will dried, the world will change. I wonder is it karma? Although i dun really believe in such thing, but what goes around comes around. 

Believe me, there is really nothing wrong, really. But its just why like that? I think i've made a very wrong decision in my life that had change my life so drastically. I cant blame her but who do i turn to? Now it just seems history is repeating itself. That scene, cant be off my mind, sometimes i told myself, its nothing actually, really. U're just too too too sensitive. Really made me feel very very awkward, very sadded. Now i understand what is put yourself in other people's shoes. God, change me. Change my life, when i've already attempted to change, to lead a nice good life. I need your strenght to carry on to lean on, to tell my problems to. 

Just some thoughts

Had a talk with my friend, i dunno. But we were talking abt army, and discussing abt the career path and all. She said only with scholarship then will be able to attain high ranks. I thought to myself as long as i work hard, nothing is impossible. But her words kinda like melt me, i think twice abt this. And i felt like crying after that, although friends around me kept encouraging me to go for my dream, but somehow i feel like some are always picking on my dream. Maybe i was too sentsitive, but i just dun feel that they some sort of support me sometimes. And it really discourages me alot :(

Love wrote on his msn nick, "shes single! Yes!" really wondered who? So sad, must be his EC. Haiz, dreams shattered now. How i wish, love, do u hear me??!!

And sometimes i think i've given too much too much until people dunno how to cherish these and they dunno how to treasure friendship. take it for granted and thought i would always give in no matter what. I'll but there is always a limit to everything. But i've tried to change all the bad in me, but if you dun, its hard. You might fail to realize, but it takes both hands to clap.

Sheesha

Friday night went to sheesha to celeb syafiqah's b'day. well, had fun but walk alot too! haha, its quite deep inside though. But the place is comfortable and nice! Still got belly dancing :D Then, they ordered food but i only ordered FRUIT SALAD! LOL, zai sia. haha, and we have fun, ate cake. The sheesha charcoal drop onto me and burn a hole on my shirt!! haha, it was hot and had tried shesha-ing. FUN! There is also belly dancing performance and the belly dancers are all so pretty! they dance very well too!! We all left tgt though, tried to rush for last train/ bus. Reach home abt midnight ah, then slept till noon the next day.. But went gym on sat night (: Finally another work out. And went church in the morning, and had lunch with friends at cafe cartel. Again, i ate ceasar salad. HAHA

The Babes <3

Nikki.Kaly.Chevy

Xue and me

Chevy.Cherie

The sheesha

My fruit salad!

The hole :(

Wan ling.chevy

Belly dancer! She's pretty man!

Chevy.Pei Shan

Birthday Girl!