Do you know about C.H.E.R.I.S.H?

How many of you know the real meaning behind this word, cherish. Its just yet another simple vocab found in the dictionary. But it definately carries great meaning behind it. All of you likes to be cherish, but not all of you knows how to cherish people. I dunno why, but this time i am not longer sad, no longer mindful, no longer mad. Perhaps, i've learnt to take things the lighter way, or i've gave up. Its either one, i know. But i've yet to figured out. Why are people always so complacent? Will they learnt a lesson until they've lost the person? Or it is always we have to settle things the hard way? I am not feeling anymore guilty because i know strongly myself that i've done whatever possible to keep this going, but seriously i really dunno what has happen to change this. And if someday, something happen, the only thing i regret most is not knowing what is the reason behind all these that happens. For all i've done, just take it lightly, i dun asked for any returns because i really cherish this. But if u were to abuse my trust and all that i've done, i really dunno how long i could carry on going. I've hang on for so long after since that, and go all way to prevent that from happening, but it seems that its coming. The worst thing that i could ever anticipate. 

Sometimes, i just need somebody to listen to me, to lend me a ear, to shower me with care. In the past, yes. But now, i dunno how. In some days, i just felt like crying my lungs out, but who am i facing? My Dog? My Stitch? My pikachu? is this all i want? Perhaps, yes, perhaps, no. I dunno. I dun even know why i cried. Its just there is too many, too many letters inside my heart. i need to cry some out to fill in more. U asked me why? why not asked urself back, Why? i am just too trusting, and let my guards down all the time, i always let my imagination take control of me. Whenever you are not happy, i asked myself, what have i done? Did i do something that saddens u, or make u angry? For 10 times, i asked myself this question 10 times. Anything that happens to u, i blame myself first. I am afraid that i am the one whose making u angry. Not because i am guilty, because i care, i cherish. And that's everything, really. I am happy, but i am always crying behind those forced smiles.

I've not changed all these while, its something, someone, somewhere that change you to really distance me so much...